Monday, June 20, 2011

Disconnected

I realize that I don’t have many friends. The occasional friend 100 miles away sure, but nobody that I see on a regular basis. I’ve disconnected myself from just about everything since the road trip ended, and I’m not quite sure why.

 

I get up at 4:30 every morning to go to work, I spend eight hours sweating in 100 degree desert heat, then come home to hurt myself with the weights or with the jogging shoes. My knees haven’t stopped aching since I started working, and yet I don’t give myself a rest.

 

I tell myself that I need to do these things, even though I know better. I tell myself that I don’t have time to do social things in this new place in which I live, no time to go meet people, no time to go grab a drink with co-workers, no time to think. No time, because I keep giving it all away to nothing.

 

I live with my sister, but we are totally independent of one another, randomly existing in the same domicile for a few moments before one or the other of us drifts away again. Sometimes going out to grab a bite to eat when we are both too exhausted to cook.

 

Fridays find me rushing to Prescott to spend my weekends with Courtney. Saturdays we play around on the boulders near Prescott – wincing, grabbing, falling, and screaming as we learn a new sport. Sundays are the only day on which I try to rest. Generally an hour or two of walking the dog, possibly a lunch with mom where we both try to talk through our problems and end up hitting the same blocks every time.

 

My camera hasn’t seen the sunlight in weeks, I try to connect to facebook, but I realize all the posts I make just reflect the terribly repetitive nature of my current life.

 

I’m not unhappy though, which is the odd part. Perhaps a bit discontent, but mostly I’m just… nothing. I’ve disconnected from being anything for a while.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Not dead, just dead tired.

The summer time is here, and the work in the vineyards is getting hot. I haven't been up to much lately. Work all day, get home and jog/walk with the dog, lift weights twice a week, cook dinner with sis, pass out. Repeat five times a week. Weekends find me in Prescott with Courtney. I just bought my own pair of climbing shoes, so it looks like bouldering and climbing will be my new hobby on saturdays. Sundays I'm trying to lay low, relax, give the body a bit of a break.

That's about it. Haven't taken the camera out lately, haven't been exploring my new home, and really; haven't done much. I'm just trying to enjoy the heat as much as I can, find a groove within which to ride for a while, and see how the rest of summer treats me.

Currently I'm sick as a dog, so lots of sleep the last few days, and it feels like the sickness is finally ebbing away.